From Spaces That Are No Longer Safe
“It was like a fun game for them to pretend to need this as much, if not MORE, than the women I saw day in day out, most of whom were in serious pain or had serious body issues.”
I used to work in lingerie sales, as a bra-fitter for a specialty bra company. We started having some trans-identified men coming in to the store to be fitted, but really more to be validated.
Mind you, this was a space for women to be able to come in and get help with bra fitting. We carried a huge size range and many plus-size bras. Some women there had never had a well-fitting bra before, some were teenaged girls very insecure about developing breasts. It was supposed to be a safe place.
But no, for my meager minimum wage pay, I had to spend hours with entitled TIM after entitled TIM. They never bought anything. Just wanted me to run a tape measure around their flat chests and tell them how great they looked in their A-cup with quadruple padding. It was like a fun game for them to pretend to need this as much, if not MORE, than the women I saw day in day out, most of whom were in serious pain or had serious body issues.
Not the worst, but that kind of behaviour is so characteristic of TIMs and is extremely male. To be that entitled to my time and other women’s space and comfort.
I was studying Midwifery in a well-known graduate midwifery program in the United States. In an assignment I was required to complete, I drafted educational materials to be given to patients. When I recieved my grade for the project, my instructor took credit off my final grade for the gendered language I used in the document. I was penalized for using the words "women" "mother" and "breast" in materials to be handed out to pregnant women. I have since withdrawn from the program.